I have written about the subject of “anger” in the past. However, I did not discuss my anger. I have written about the topic of “fear” in my past. But, I did not share with anyone about my fears. I have written about the “hurting child” within myself. Nevertheless, I did not reveal the identity of the “hurting child” within me.

So, here it goes…

Why am I “angry” about? Why am I so angry at myself? And, why am I so angry at the world around me?

If I pull off my mask, and if I look in the mirror, what I see is anger towards myself, anger towards my own earthly life & earthly existence, and anger towards the species who I happen to share the same DNA or similar DNA with…

I am what is now considered a “spiritual” person. In my past, I also considered myself a “religious” person.

How could a spiritual person or a religious person, who believes in the possibility of a good world, and who tries the best he or she knows how to create this world around himself or around herself in my everyday existence, be such an angry person?

I believe in a Creator or in a Creative Principle within life, within the Universe itself, and believe in a creative power within myself.

Then, why am I angry? The more I try to exercise my “faith” the angrier I seem to get…

I have looked at the Creator of the Universe as a Being or as a Higher Power that is outside of myself, an external “God,” plainly speaking.

But, I was wrong…

This Creative Power or Creative Force in my life is actually and in reality, serving the purpose as a mirror to myself.

What does this mirror reveal to me? It always reveal to me and points out to me the beauty and majesty, and even the “magic” within nature and within the Created World.

So, why should this be so unsettling or so disturbing to me?

“What is disturbing” to me occurs when I look in the mirror and when I look at nature and see how disconnected I am from nature, as well as how disconnected I am from “myself.”

This “disturbing” or distorted image that I see in the mirror makes me afraid. It also makes me scared. It also elicits feelings of hopelessness within me.

What am I scared of? Why am I hurting inside so much?

I am afraid I will never feel connected to nature. And, I am scared that I will never become that version of myself that is “true” or “real.”

I hurt inside, longing for this lost child, longing for this little boy who simply wanted to be seen, wanted to be heard, and who wanted to be hugged.

I think there is a part in all of us that feels unseen and unheard, feels never acknowledged, and who never feels celebrated or never feels lifted up.

Why do we feel invisible? Why do we feel unseen? Why are we afraid that “everyone else in the world is out to use us, hurt us, get us, and take advantage of us?”

Is this the “truth,” that every other human being on the planet and every fellow member of the human species is out to “get us,” “genocide” our existence, or render us as “invisible.”

I think not…

So, then, how do we break this cycle that drives us down the road to anger? How do we decelerate and finally put the brakes on the hurting and scared part of ourselves?

How do we “heal” this wounded self? How do we pick up the “wounded child” who feels knocked down and dragged out every day in our homes, in our offices and workplaces, and even in our own families. This wounded child is particularly vulnerable online in the cyber world of social media.

All of us, including myself, must learn to resist the temptation to attack and blame others for how we feel.

And, all of us also need to learn to resist the temptation to psychologically harm and emotionally attack ourselves.

This is true for me. It also may be true for you…

Can we really learn to forgive others that have hurt us, who have harmed us, who have made us feel invisible, or who have made us feel “less than?”

An even more poignant question would be, “can we or will we ever find the power and the love within ourselves to forgive the reality and the fact that we have fallen short of our own expectations towards our own selves?”

The latter question, is, in my book, the larger one looming on the horizon for me, as well.

Jesus says or writes, “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life.” And that “no one comes to the Father except through me.”

Is this an appeal to religious or spiritual exclusivity? Or, was this, instead, a harbinger of who we are actually meant to be and who we are supposed to be as a human person?

I do not believe Jeshua, the rabbi and teacher from Galilee, was trying or attempting to create spiritual country clubs back in his day.

The Way… whose way? My own personal way

The Truth… whose truth? My own personal Truth…

The Life… whose life? My own real and true life…

Just some thoughts for today…